A pet peeve of mine...one of many...

The thing I would like to discuss with you today is something that has affected me numerous times throughout my life. It's something that is both directly tied to our selfish human natures, and infinitely annoying to most of the people I've talked to about it. It's something I am guilty of, and I'm certain every one of you are as well. I've struggled and struggled, and I still do not feel as if I have victory over it. I think I will give you an example of what I'm talking about. Here you go.
Person 1: "I am so excited, my birthday is next week on the 5th!" (Yes, I realize next week does not contain a 5th.)
Person 2: "Oh! My neighbor's son's is on the 4th!"
That's it. It's as simple as that. Can we really, seriously, not just say, "Oh, great! Happy birthday! What are your plans?" without bringing our trivial knowledge of some not-really-coincidence up? Honestly! Thousands of peoples' birthdays are on any given day in any given week. Here's the thing. I DON'T CARE. ESPECIALLY if it's someone I don't even know! Please, just don't bother.
Here's another scenario, and this one happens all the time as well:
Person 1: "I have to get my wisdom teeth pulled. I'm pretty nervous."
Person 2: "Oh, you should be! When I had mine out it was HORRIBLE! I was down for a WEEK!"
Seriously, if I don't ask, don't tell me. Empathize, tell me if I need something to let you know (if you mean it), or just simply say, "That sucks." Don't tell me it's going to be the worst experience of my life.
Possibly the worst case of this kind of thing is with newly married or about-to-get-married couples. I understand that people joke around and say things like, "Don't do it! You still have time to get out!" But, dear readers, stop. Please. For the sake of all that is good. Just shut your mouth. I do not care that if you could do everything over again that you wouldn't get married. I do not care that every problem you had was magnified when you got married. And most of all, JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE MISERABLE DOES NOT MEAN I MUST BE AS WELL. Get this through your heads.
Some of you may have seen my facebook status before I got married that said something along the lines of, "Don't tell me what your experience was like and say mine will be the same, don't tell me marriage isn't awesome, when I get pregnant don't tell me kids are a pain and that regardless of what I say, mine will grow up to be spoiled brats, etc. etc." And I mean it. I'm an adult, and your advice is only welcome when I ask for it. Your negativity is never welcome. Your miserableness will not be shared by me. Your assumptions about my life are probably incorrect. If you hear a rumor about me, for pete's sake why don't you just ask me about it? If you feel like you don't want to ask because it would be too nosy or if it's too embarrassing or whatever, just forget it, cuz if you can't talk to me about it you sure as heck shouldn't talk to anybody else about it. If you have a problem with me, take it up with me. Don't take it to someone else in the form of a prayer request for me, that's just an excuse to gossip.
This is the way I feel about it, but I can't be the only one. If someone oversteps their boundaries and says something out of line about YOUR life, say something back, and tell them to kindly back off. If ever I am too nosy with you, tell me, and I will shut up about it. And I expect you to do the same. Thank you.